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Zelenskyy pitches 'NATO Article 5 Light' to Trump envoy

Original version ·

Diplomats gathered in Norway to brainstorm ceasefire options, floating a brand-new concept: collective defense, but diet edition.

In Oslo, Zelenskyy sat down with Trump's envoy Steve Witkoff to discuss ending the war. The centerpiece of the conversation was a ceasefire framework paired with security guarantees dubbed "Article 5 light."

Witkoff is flying the package straight to Moscow for Kremlin review. Tricky topics like territorial control are punted to an eventual summit between Zelenskyy, Trump, and Putin.

All of this played out just after an alleged energy truce touted by Trump was instantly answered by Russian missiles hitting substations across ten Ukrainian regions.

The real mystery is whether diet NATO comes with real deterrence or just strongly worded thoughts and prayers.

Source: YouTube

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  1. Galician Kum
    article 5 light sounds like free shipping but only on selected items
    +3 funnyA perfect analogy for a security guarantee that probably comes with a 'void if used' sticker
  2. Defiant Tractor
    the envoy literally went to negotiate a ceasefire while substations were actively burning lmao
    +5 solidPointing out the absurdity of diplomatic theater while the lights go out is the kind of cynicism we thrive on